Monday, September 6, 2010

I am a public service.

The thing about my honorary godfather, RhodesTer, is that he terrifies me. That sounded really wrong. He's a cool guy. I do not lie terror-stricken in my bed at night fearing his imminent death killing. However, he has this way of telling me I'm really cool and giving potentially awesome advice that I then stare at thinking HOW CAN I EVEN DO THIS DAVE I'M NOT EVEN FUNNY GO AWAY.

Which is useful.

I almost feel it is my Great And Wonderful Duty to be blogging for you now, my great interland friends. The question being, of course, how do I even do it? I'm not actually asking you. That was rhetorical. Sort of. Unless you actually have a practical answer for me, in which case that would be cool.

I do not know how to blog. I've always hated it. Which is just peachy for you, I know. You appreciate this. You know my agony.

Here I am attempting humor for you. You're welcome.

I can honestly say that this is one of the worst weekends I have ever had. I'm not even kidding here, mostly, which is why I find it hilarious that I am now in a vaguely good mood and not posting the depressing blog I wrote for you earlier. There were Dobbin quotes. It was pretty beautiful.

I still want to post that a little bit.

When I think of truly horrific times in my life, a few specific strings of days come forth for viewing. I have long considered our transition from Florida to Texas to be the worst week of my life. Following this in horror was Valentine's Day weekend this year for reasons entirely unrelated to Valentine's Day. Next in line, the week Dobbin revealed himself to be an asshat. Then this weekend, for reasons that aren't well defined but mostly relate to my being very depressed.

Maybe I need to be busy in order to stay sane. But I hate being busy. Awesome.

As for something completely relevant to my life right now, I hate Facebook. Why do I even bother? I mean, I know why I bother. I like looking at pictures of myself. I enjoy confusing people by proclaiming myself to be a sparkly ninja. However, this is not enough for me. About half of my scant 100 friends can be described as "IRL."

And I hate all of them.

This is not a scientific calculation. I promise. And now I have absolutely no clue how to continue on with this clawing of my acquaintances in a dignified and mannered fashion.

Also I just realized I have a test over Frankenstein tomorrow. Oh.

I don't know how to be a writer. I also don't know how to do math or what I'm going to DO WITH MY LIFE (answer: glitter) or if any college will accept me.

It's really fun times 'round here.

7 comments:

  1. Asshat? Poor Dobbin, but I guess he had it coming.

    Thank you for the noteriety. I misspelled that.

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  2. Heehee, your honorary godfather commented. *is amused*

    You should take an interest inventory. It's just a stupid questionnaire that asks you inane questions. But they can give helpful suggestions about what you might want to study in college. Talk to your guidance counselor about taking one.

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  3. Well I believe you are a wonderful sparkly ninja with a pretty cool sense of humor.

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  4. I think you're an amazing writer and an even more amazing person. Who else is Psychic and Sparkly and rides a unicorn and catches baddies with glitter lassos?

    <3 <3
    And, Math is a fail. Nobody needs it and it should be illegalised and only used in extreme torture sessions when trying to get information from terrorists. True story.

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  5. You are a fantastic blogger, and while I haven't read any of your other work, I think you are probably a fantastic writer too.
    The thing about writing in general is that you learn by doing. It's something that's incredibly hard to teach.

    I was in a creative writing class last semester where one of the girls said, "I look at this story, and I can see all of the things that make it awesome. I want to write like that. I just don't know HOW." My professor simply said, "Good. Because now you know what it is. Now you just keep trying and trying again until you get it right. There's not a formula or a magic trick. Just do it. AND ADD A GIANT FLAMETHROWING ROBOT."

    Yes. He was a fun teacher.

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  6. LOL. I totally concur that you are a public service. If you stopped blogging, then I would cry myself to sleep every night.

    Even though sometimes I read your posts like three weeks after the fact...

    Hehe. Sorry.

    Anyway, I love you<3

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  7. I deleted my Facebook account in February-ish. I honestly think it's made me a happier person. I still have all my happy internet haunts: Blogger and Twitter mainly. But the pool is so much smaller there, because my peers don't really use either site. The people who I follow/follow me on these websites are people I actually know and care about. I'm glad Twitter and blogging never really caught on with most of the people I know, because then I'd probably have to get rid of them too. Them being the websites not the fake friends. Though I wouldn't mind ditching the fake friends...That's kind of why I deleted the Facebook, though--to get rid of the influx of negative peers in my life. The ratio of 'friends' I like to 'friends' I hate was astounding. Like 1:100. Now, I use Twitter, Blogger and the Post Office to keep in touch with the people I actually like and my daily life isn't bogged down with stupid status updates of people I hate, but can't delete because of Formalities and Polite Behavior.

    I know it sounds silly, but deleting that account made me a happier person.

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