Blog Every Day April: 4/15

". . .family, like arsenic, works best in small doses... unless you prefer to die."
Dash & Lily's Book of Dares
Rachel Cohn and David Levithan

My mom is leaving on a week-long trip tomorrow. This, compounded with the fact that I have taken an intense dislike to people as a general entity in the past days and been run through various emotional and routine ringers as a matter of course, has made this particular week less than stellar.

I will buy each and every one of you your very own personal pony if next week is any better.

(I shan't be ALONE, Internet. An elder family human shall be staying with us, which I choose not to comment on at this particular moment because I am a controlled individual. Also, I really want my mom to have a good trip. Any whining will be purely/probably selfish.)

I key words into my phone as a purple toothbrush juts put of my mouth and the Fresh Mint! flavoring of my tooth paste begins to wear off. This is less exciting, in fact, than it sounds. While the picture of someone blogging while upkeeping their oral hygiene may sound romantic, I can now confirm that it is mostly inconvenient and not as much of a time saver as I'd hoped.

The more you learn.

Another fun fact: at least one of my acne medications is toxic if ingested. In case you were, you know, planning on licking my face anytime soon. (This is one of the handy things about having legit acne from the tender age of eight. Genetics, ahoy!)

Upon partaking of my many vitamins (my general practitioner is enthusiastic concerning their existence), I venture over the baby gate that fails to keep the dog out of mischief (wishful thinking?) and promptly stub my toe. The things I do for you, Internet! A hazard, you are. If it weren't for your good looks and quick wit I might have to disown you for safety reasons alone.

I am clearly a normal individual.

(Normal? Yuck.)