"Well sure, who doesn't need a boyfriend? But realistically, those exotic creatures are hard to come by."
Dash & Lily's Book of Dares
Rachel Cohn and David Levithan
I feel I should admit something to you, friends: sometimes I watch reality shows in which brides choose their wedding dresses at fancy salons. Please know that I am thoroughly embarrassed by this, though it's morbid curiosity and the need to allow my brain a rest as much as anything.
It occurs to me that I am eighteen years old and have little true insight on matters of lifelong commitment*, but it breaks my heart that people spend so much money on weddings. The more I watch women (and their families) spend thousands upon thousands of dollars on the dress of their dreams the more I dearly wish to hit my head against a wall.
Granted, I have never dreamed of my wedding day, so I can't say I understand the mindset. I will go shopping only under threat of injury (Laurel is planning this) and would rather be trampled by a llama than spend months upon months of my life planning a party. I hate parties. I'm all for celebrating lasting love, but I cannot personally see myself doing it through the acquisition of massive debt**.
I realize that I'm playing the extremes here, for which I apologize, and I wish not to offend those who do want an extravagant wedding or even merely like them. The last time I went on about this a few of you took the time to explain why weddings don't necessarily suck to me, which I found to be quite enjoyable and useful information. Still, I am of the personal opinion that changing one's surname for the sake of coupledom is unnecessary to my happiness in life and plan not to do so if and when I tie the knot with the tall, dark and handsome young man I clearly have hidden in my closet.
Boys are so confusing. All of them. That is all.
I do, on the other hand, feel I am the ideal candidate be someone's fake girlfriend. Despite my crippling social ineptitude, I am an intelligent young woman not unskilled at banter. I accept payment in chocolate turtles, spicy dialogue and ink pens.
*I realize now that this curiously coincides with a certain REGAL event. I assure you that this was not my original intent.
**I feel this should serve as an interesting read for my future self as she plans her multi-million dollar wedding to a renowned metrosexual marine biologist called Siegfried the Slippery, if nothing else.
HAHAHAHAHA. I would love for you to be my fake girlfriend, Katherine. ;)
ReplyDeleteAlso, yeah...I don't like extravagant parties either. I mean, they can be fun to attend and experience, but I can't see myself ever throwing one.
But my parents do have some money saved for my wedding. Idk how much, but apparently, they ARE anticipating it to some extent. And my mom's mentioned to me that she kind of wants me to have two wedding ceremonies. An American one with a white dress, and a Bengali one with a red sari. But she might not be serious about that. OH WELL, WE'LL SEE. All of that is in FUTURE TIMES.
And I want to take my husband's name just for the sake of family cohesiveness. (Cause I love my name, but it gets kind of old constantly explaining why you, your mom, and your dad all have different last names.)
LOVE YOU
As much as I would have to love someone to marry them (gah! I hate pronouns! Plural for singular = massively confusing though totally correct!) I think it's quite disturbing that they (again!) should expect me to give up my identity as a marker of that love. It's not happening.
ReplyDeleteTradition, convenience, blah blah blah... if we don't challenge that nonsense we'll never have progress. Voting, wearing pants, working, going to school... all the privileges we take for granted were once challenged by forward-thinking women brave enough to challenge those traditions.
RANTING. I AM DOING IT.
And that's just on the name nonsense.
Anyway, I'm just going to end by saying that
a) Weddings are annoying.
b) I wrote a really funny (probably not. I though it was) literary theory analysis of weddings.
c) Maybe you can see it sometime.
d) While working on that paper, I had a conversation with a BOY who reminds me IMMENSELY of the kid from Looking for Alaska. Or Paper Towns. I can't remember. He reminds me of a John Green character.
e) While chatting about weddings/engagement rings/proposals/gross traditions and I loudly proclaimed that I wouldn't change my name.
f) He said, "Good."
g) My faith in men was restored.
h) Because clearly some of them think progressively, too.
i) Longest wrap-up ever.