Blog Every Day April: 4/18

" 'But you see, that's the luxury of being a lout--you get to be selective about when you care and when you don't. The rest of us get stuck when your care goes shallow.' "

Dash & Lily's Book of Dares

Rachel Cohn and David Levithan

My eyes burn as I blink. I should have eaten more at dinner. I don't feel well in that life, rather than illness, is attempting to beat me down. I miss my mom. I am in a constant state of measuring movements, and I almost don't have the energy to hate it.

Life makes a lot more sense when I make use my eyedrops, I have found. But I'm stubborn. So.

Interesting Katherine fact: I have Duane's syndrome, which is a muscle imbalance that makes life super interesting*. When I attempt to look left, my left eye doesn't quite understand. As such, my right eye goes into panic mode and rushes to the rescue. Don't worry, it screams, fire extinguisher under one arm as it approaches the wreckage. I can fix this! It's in my training manual! And so the right eye turns to the left, as well, and the world sort of mirrors itself until I can't see anything properly.

My ophthalmologist counsels that there isn't much to be done and that I must only turn my head when I attempt to look left. Then people won't notice.

People who notice and care enough to comment can go snog a llama, for all I care. Why yes, I do move my eye this way in conversation for the sole purpose of annoying you. Thank you for asking.**

In the past few days I have briefed you on my acne medication (deadly), vitamins (I take them), popcorn consumption (nomnomnom) and eye charades (overzealous right eyes unite!). Really. You must love me to read this mess. Or else you're crazy. Probably both.

I love you for it.

Days until mommy comes home: 5

*It isn't a big deal. I am dramatic.

**ANGST.